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Sunday, June 29, 2008

Very desirable woman with a very smelly problem

Many women have the habit of envying other women who seem to have everything. One woman who is still envied by many is Sandra.

Sandra turns heads because of her stunning looks. She has the face of a model and the body of a goddess. And she knows it.

But at 32, she’s still not married and neither is marriage anywhere in the horizon it seems.

Don’t ask me why because it is difficult to put a finger on the exact problem.

However there is one little dark secret that really upsets Sandra. To some it may look petty but to her it is a very big deal that has caused her lots of distress and even sleepless nights.

Sandra has a lot of gas in the stomach and mostly she cannot control it and the result is that she farts at the most inconvenient of times.

Like when she is in an extremely romantic situation with heavy passionate kissing going on and when all indications are that the situation will smoothly flow into other “more serious” things. All of a sudden you will hear a loud farting sound and even as she turns purple with embarrassment, a nasty smell will start to suffocate the atmosphere. Believe me a very nasty smell.

Men who are ready for “action” are like a military tank in that there is nothing that will stop them short of being shot dead on the spot. Least of all some fart from the source of their desire. But once this guy was going down on her and Sandra liked it very much except that she was very nervous that something would go wrong. And it did. The guy moved from down there in a hurry. That is one of the reasons why Sandra likes that kind of attention from a man but also does NOT like it at all. That’s female-speak and impossible to explain to a man.

The problem is even worse if she happens to have had a few drinks. It becomes totally uncontrollable and she will end up farting loudly several times at the most inconvenient of times.

To make matters even more tragic, Sandra has never had the luxury of enjoying an orgasm like other women because if she relaxes enough to start feeling close enough to one, the inevitable will always happens and that will promptly spoil the mood for her as she tenses in embarrassment.

That is how serious the problem is.

Sandra is grateful for this interesting blog and the fact that people can ask questions here and even get help while remaining anonymous. She hopes she will get some useful suggestions from some of the very intelligent and very experienced folks who visit this blog frequently.


Anonymous said...

ha ha ha ha Joan wewe ni mwisho!!

This is the craziest tale yet.

Now too much gas in the stomach is a very simple problem to take care of. It starts by changing diet from junk food to healthy food.

I could be wrong.

Mcheku said...

Now this is hot udaku, I sympathise with Sandra but her story is too funny!

David said...

My gal told me old this friend of hers who almost resembled an angel with looks,bt had this slight problem,she was chongo.her eyes roamd all over in diffrent directions independent of the she used 2 drown her self in alcohol 2 get over it,

Anonymous said...

very small problem,she should drink aloe vera juice twice a day for a week,avoid skiping meals and drop beans,she should also add garlic to her food regularly,end of problem

Anonymous said...

Hi guys. I pity the lady but I dont think I can hear or smell anything untill I am done. I bet men dont leave stones unturned!

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