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Thursday, July 10, 2008

Be Warned: What a mini-skirt or tight trouser really does to a typical man

Careful research has unearthed some fascinating information that should be of great use to many, especially ladies fond of showing off their nice legs occasionally by wearing a skirt that is challenged er… lengthwise. Or those who leave very little to the imagination of onlookers with the skin tight trousers they wear around they generous backsides.

We ladies know what seeing another sister wearing a mini-skirt or tight trousers does to us. If I can confess, I usually do a thorough analysis of them legs (and sometimes other physical attributes) at a split-second glance and will be able to tell you with a very thin margin of error which part of the country the woman comes from. Obviously with the kind of political challenges we are currently facing as a nation, it would be inappropriate for me to continue any further along those lines.

What most men do not know is that some older women succeed very well in diverting attention from other aging “assets” while getting the necessary attention from much younger men by exposing their thighs. I have seen men painfully collide with parking meters on the streets of Nairobi because they just couldn’t get their eyes off some rather aging but generously exposed thighs. Had they bothered to somehow force their eyes away from the thighs and just a little higher, they would have laughed at themselves. I once saw this nice sister whose face had a colour that does not have a name in English or any other language most probably caused by the excessive use of harmful skin lighteners during her earlier decades of existence. Her sagging breasts were so heavy on “the heavy cotton equipment” she had put on to hold them in place that there were visible bulges at the bottom of it. Obviously any full-blooded animal of the male species never saw any of those details because their eyes never left the thighs.

If you wear a mini skirt to work and notice that the men are going to the gents a little too frequently and then tend to take too long to come out, then be warned do not accept the piece of orange he offers you at lunch time and do not for any reason congratulate him during the day by shaking his right hand. Men are known to frequently forget to wash their hands and since this is a family site, if you cannot guess what frenzied activity his right hand was most probably involved with in the wash room I am afraid I am not able to spell it out here for you.

Ladies should be especially careful when they sit down in offices where the desks may allow other male members of staff to see things they should not be seeing in the office. So next time that elderly co-worker who has great grand children starts sweating in the office early in the morning, you can be sure that he is not coming down with anything. If anything he is going up with something completely different, if you know what I mean.

By the way, these days you cannot assume that fellow sisters will not also sweat like the poor old man. What is this world coming to?

Anyway in conclusion let me say that some sharp cooperate-type ladies have discovered great benefits in the office wearing these kind of outfits when seeking approval and authority to do various things in the office. The usually mean accountant who takes the whole day to release cash for some company errand will tend to act a lot faster and ask far less questions or no questions at all if one is “appropriately” dressed. Not to mention that difficult leave application you are seeking.

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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Thats a big lie as nowadays men don't need to ogle at mini skirted or tight long trousered ladies.The internet has the whole answer for that as you need to see the whole action itself!!!!!. More interesting that ogling your office mate and getting into problems and unnecessary expenses!!